AOR REVIEW - BRITTON - ROCK HARD (1988)

The Player:
Michael Britton

The Players:
Skip Frank
Jim McMellen
Patrick Schunk
Gary Holland

What Is It?
A late 80s unknown Hair metal - AOR themed group led by someone named Michael Britton. It is a fairly to very enjoyable record, and may be one of the rarest ones in my collection, depending on its actual scarcity. It has a lighthearted sound most of the time, always optimistic and that's what seems to separate it from regular hair metal. The main thing I get out of this album are the amazing choruses. "Living On The Red Line" is a prime example. Also, you guessed it, Jim McMellen SHINES on his rock-y yet skilled leads. The song is more important than the riff on this album, and it's a refreshing change from what all the other late 80s rockers came out with. It comes off as....well, the only word I can really use is "Mighty". Solid, commanding rock.

Does It Suck?
Did I just hear SWEEPS on the title track? Hell no, this doesn't suck. This album is basically what the title deems it. Rock solid, and much more enjoyable than say, Diving For Pearls. http://www.sleazeroxx.com/news08/0916bri.shtml Go there for more info.

Starting with the first side, the first two tracks, "Don't Wanna Be Your Fool" and "Living On The Red Line" are perfect punch-you-in-the-mouth openers. "Red Line" is probably Britton's "Freewheel Burning". You just have to listen for the full effect. "Hold On" admittedly borrows from Boston with the chord progression and the chorus harmony is exactly the same as "Photograph" by Def Leppard. However, it still manages a very optimistic sound, despite being a ballad. The next track, "Over The Edge" could practically be the second part of the previous track, but contrasts well. "She Lights The Fire" starts out scattered, but ends sounding complete.

The second side is a bit of a different story. "Rock Hard", the title track, is executed strongly, as it should be. Then it seems "Name The Time" is the in-between track from the title track and "Bring On The Body". The latter drags on too long and is basically a party track. It is also laughably positioned right next to the album's main ballad, "You're The One" which, sadly actually sounds pretty earnest. Frankly, I don't know how this kind of thing happens, but it does on a frightening number of 80s rock records. Even the average listener may think "and they want us to take them seriously?" This is not really the band's fault, but it IS one little strike against the whole package.

Finally, the last song is one named "(No More) Drinking and Driving". Yes, you fucking read right. This song, while admittedly "Hard Rockin'", sounds like it was written for a fucking commercial. It's a decent song, but hilarious in execution and while good in its intentions, will make the average listener blush the first few times around.

Notes:
On the back of the record, the band thanks Autograph and Steve Lynch.
Under "Very Special Thanks To:" they thank "Jon Johnson for believing in us, and more importantly, warning us about the perils of 'jalapeno dick'".

Wrap Up:
It actually seems, upon another listen that Britton went into this project having MOST of the ideas and songs down (which sounds better than most bands) but kind of scraped up more, slightly staler ideas which can be found in some of the songs on the B side. That being the only real flaw, this record is definitely worth your buck as long as it's reasonably priced. Having the vinyl version myself, I would really like to have the reissue just to have the commentary by the band members. One thing I always find that's missing in these unknown records is the stories of these guys - and what they have to say. You usually just have to scrounge the lyrics (that you can hear) and check the back of the sleeve, which is more often than not disappointing. In any case, this record is overall quite solid and a good listen. For its genre, an easy 7/10. Recommended, although maybe it'd be better to listen to the 2nd side first.

BLUES METAL REVIEW - ROXANNE (1988)

http://www.aor-fm.com/bands/1849_ROXANNE.aspx

(click link, scroll down for an audio sample)

/\ That audio sample is perfect, because it captures the "best" moment of this album, and subsequently the epitomization of "Blues Metal". OOooohohhh keep on pushin', babe. I WANNA be your MAAAAHHHHNNNN....




The Player:
Jamie Brown

The Players:
The rest of the god damn band

What The Fuck Is It?
It appears, upon a cursory search, to be an album that a few people bought in 1988, listened to it and summed up the experience with a well placed "ehhh". Also notice that the cover art is the exact definition of "Blues Metal Cover". Four brown haired young men in heavy black coats, you know, just aimlessly strolling through a southern California WASTELAND.

Does It Suck?
Yes and No. Let me explain - according to science and maths, this is an average album by definition. The first side is enjoyable as a feel-good rocker for the most part, plus the lead tone is similar to that of Michael Denner's on "Don't Break The Oath" which is an automatic +1. The intro to "Nothin' To Lose" is one of the high parts of the album, the others probably being certain big washy choruses. Come to think of it, probably the perfect thing for me to compare this album to is Winger's debut. There is nothing out there that sounds more like it, except the leads aren't quite as good. Overall, the thing that I take away from this album is that the band had an idea of how they wanted to appear and they stuck to it pretty well, and were fairly versatile within that image.

Then we come to Side B. Side B minus "Sweet Maria" and "Coming For You" is an absolute abomination, and I can tell you that even between the excessive skipping my turntable does because of the poor shape the B side is in. The record would skip entire sections at a time, offering me mere glimpses into the past (Or horrible future??) and I now know why. The last person who listened to this (in 1988, presumably) was so distraught by Roxanne's cover of play that funky music that he, in all his mulleted glory went out back and attacked the record with an electric sander in hopes that he would never again hear the shitpile of Roxanne's B side. Let me give you an overview: "Not The Same" is just a rambling monologue, presumably, about OOOHH THAT WOMAN
"Can't Stop Thinking" begins with a telephone "tone" and an answering machine message from, presumably a late 80s (absolute) FOX. The vocalists vocals are then subject to an effect that makes it sound as if he's singing into a telephone.....

play that funky music is the closer...and it makes you wonder how seriously these guys take themselves. Don't get me wrong, it is an EXCEPTIONAL cover, and Jamie Brown is probably the only person on earth who could almost get away with a fucking cover of play that funky music...

Finally, Are There Any Woman-Cursing Blues Songs?
There are so fucking many I lost count.

Wrap-Up
Overall, this is an average album and is recommended only for the small possibility that one may severely enjoy one of the choruses on side A or the solos. Otherwise, it's pretty "meh". For Me, 6/10